License plates and bumper stickers

I am a big fan and the official United States judge of the cleverness of personalized license plates and bumper stickers. License plates are rated on a score of five to zero. Five is a plate that makes me chuckle or thing “very clever “. Zero is a plate that I rate as a waste of money. TOY4ME on some idiot’s Toyota is a waste of money. The car owner obviously has no creativity. If the plate says something like MKJUOR1the owner gets a zero since nobody will have a clue what message the owner is trying to say.

Today I saw the plate HATRS NV which after I figured out the owner was proud of his car and not a milliner, made me chuckle at the owners creativity and use of somewhat recently popular vernacular ‘hater’. Score of five.

Bumper stickers take less creativity on the part of the sticker applier but they do tell you a lot about the vehicle’s owner. The owner doesn’t have to think of what to print in seven or fewer characters in as is the case of license plates.

Bumper stickers are interesting as they make you think “Why did that idiot think it was so important that I read someone else’s add or creative comment, that he would put a permanent blemish on his several thousand dollar investment?”.

Bumper stickers are also scored by me with the five to zero rating scale. A recently scored bumper sticker that received a score of four said ‘Uppity Women Unite’. The same car had a sticker that says ‘Vegetarians taste better’. This sticker also rated a four for a total score of nine as the car owner received a bonus point for two good stickers blemishing the same automobile.

Below is a nice example of a hard to score one. Can you say “Berkeley”? Also my motorcycle. I will let you score my plate and bumper sticker. My wife wouldn’t let me place the bumper sticker on the family car as she thought it would look trashy. Go figure.




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